Days get worst

My week went from bad to worst. I said something yesterday to someone I didn't mean. I was tired and frustrated because they were getting more attention than me. It's not that I don't have friends it's just a hassle to keep up with everyone so I don't even try, except my close friends. Everything that I said was not all false I really do think you shouldn't make yourself available for everyone. I wish I could turn back the hands of time and just kept my comment to myself. I'm better off having that eat my soul than not have that person next to me. This issue is small compared to all the other issues we have had in the past. To let this effect what we have is stupid and ridicules. We have way too much fun together and we're building history which the person lacks of, do to their child hood situation.
It really hurts when a person doesn't even attempt to work things out. It just feels like they wanted this to happen. I'm confused to what did we really have. Just the thought of another man to touch those lips not knowing the value of what they have sickens me. I try to think positive but it's hard when you get the cold shoulders. I've been a good and loyal man. A woman's dream. You’ve witness me give you my last dollar…I’ve been put through so much that a lot of people would’ve just quit. I was there when you were sick and weak. I was there when you had no place to sleep. I was there to give you advice and support you. I was there, not the next man and I want you to remember that.